Tough, I want to get a few things straight before you read it.

1. You will most likely waste your time with it
2. I do not claim to be a philosopher or whatsoever
3. I just copied and pasted it, removed that person’s last name for you being most likely unable to identify it.
4. I don’t know if that is weird, stupid and whatnot, and I don’t care, because most likely it is ‘different’.
5. Don’t try to understand me based on it, that’s supposed to be hard, because I dont want to be.

OMAR

August 2 at 12:25pm

The days of our life on earth are numbered and we can do nothing to overcome death. If we wish to overcome the power of death on us and receive eternal life, we will have to take the help of the Almighty God who is the Creator and our Provider.
You and I and most of us (not excluding you) have a lot of worldly knowledge but lack spiritual knowledge. So I suggest you go to this link, read a little and in your free time give me your comments:
link:\the-good-way.com/eng/intro/i03.htm
Looking forward to your reply excitedly.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 2 at 6:19pm

lol, stop trying, you won’t get me converted anyway, lol
As we can overcome death for some time, we already did by living on this earth anyway. We should however not intend to try to live eternally. It can be very frustrating to have to live forever. Think about it how it’d be for you if you could not die in whatever circumstances.
Oh, and I’m sure a person that can read the mind of others is way spiritual enough… In case you understand.
If just the-better-way.com wouldn’t already be registered I’d put a copy of ” ‘where does it go to god?’ asked the little piglet” on there

OMAR

August 7 at 12:24pm

Thank you, Dorian, for sharing your inner thoughts with me so openly.
About eternal life, don’t you worry. In the next world there is no more pain, no sorrow, only love, joy and peace, which is beyond understaning and imagination. So, my friend, don’t make the mistake of depriving yourslef of it.
Happy to know that you can read the mind of others. That’s a gift from God. Thank Him for it and enjoy the privilege not given to all.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 7 at 8:13pm

Eternal life cannot be always without pain, sorrows, hate and dreadfulness. As life constrains around the mind the mind may want a change which aparently never comes. It cannot be, as everything, beyond undstanding and imagination. The human mind can only see what it can imagine and understand and yet may not understand at its fullest.
I don’t want eternal life, it will cause a lot of boredom. If I want to, I would like to be able to make it an end, when it is time. An eternal and definite end. So that whatever there comes cannot bring me back and won’t involve with me at all.
Well, I am not happy to be able to do so, because it’s not reading but more like everyone talking and you just can’t overhear it. And you can only hear what the think but not dig in their minds. It’s an annoyance no priviledge, but we always don’t want what we have and want what we don’t have, so I guess I’m just plain normal there.

OMAR

August 8 at 9:18am

Your views on life are very interesting.
Our wanting or not wanting eternal life cannot change our destinies. All of us have a Master whom we may choose to obey or disobey.
If we obey, we go to heaven, if we don’t we go to hell.
However normal or abnormal we may be we will go to where we deserve to go which is determined not by our actions but by our faith in Him.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 8 at 4:22pm

I am my own master, which in this case mean I only need to obey to myself, which then again should not be that hard, should it?
There’s no heaven or hell as you may refer to. When we die we’re gone for good for the maggots to be in clover with our remains.
Faith in whom?
I can’t believe into something that I cannot prove existence of, and that does not want me to know it existed in the first place by showing me the fact that is. In whatever reasonable way. But I think I told you before.

OMAR

August 8 at 7:16pm

Obeying yourself is the easiest thing to do. It seems you are not interested in doing hard work. Never mind that.
You seem to believe in the philosophy of eat-and-drink-and-be-happy. I believe in the next world too.
Yes, Dorian, I know that you do not believe in God but that does not make Him non-existent. It is just that you reject his preseence just because you do not feel it. Feeling and seeing, by the way, can be deceptive. I have no desire to compel you to believe in what I believe nor can you make me believe in the false philosophy of non-extistence of God.
Hope to hear from you on this matter again, if you so desire.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 9 at 12:27am

I do not have the urge to obey anything else but me, clearly by defining myself as my master.
No I don’t. But I don’t believe in the next world. It’s a proven scientific fact, that some electro stuff is leaving the corpse of dead animals (it’s not been tested on human bodies cause it’s illegal and maybe immoral) the moment they die, but that’s it. It does not prove a next world or rebirth whatsoever.
God does not exist. If a god would be willing to have me believing in it, it should convince me of its very own existence in the first place, if it doesn’t it’s not there for me. That proof doesn’t have to be me being able to see it, cause emotions can’t be seen either, but they’re there. It’s pure logic revolving around known facts. I know a lot but even more knowledge there always is, of which I know nothing. When time comes I will know better, but aslong as the knowledge does not want to let me know it, the knowledge cannot exist for me as it is, in whatsoever shape and form.

OMAR

August 11 at 6:48pm

By obeying only yourself, you are not only disobeying the Almighty God, you are also going against the universal law of Nature. This way you will land yourself in great trouble. How I wish that God gave you His wisdom to avoid self-induced problems.
The Bible says: BY FAITH WE UNDERSTAND THAT THE UNIVERSE WAS FORMED AT GOD’S COMMAND, SO THAT WHAT IS SEEN WAS NOT MADE OUT OF WHAT WAS VISIBLE.
Hope you will room for doubt in what you beleive as the absolute truth.
God bless you with His widsom and peace that I cannot give you but He alone can.
OMAR

OMAR

August 12 at 6:49am

We walk by faith not by sight. It is natural human tendency to use our physical eyes than walk by faith. In our spiritual life we are asked to walk by faith than with our physical eyes. Jesus is no more seen through human eyes; and it is well, for faith’s sight is saving, instructing, transforming. When Samaritan woman questioned Jesus, ”On which mountain we shall worship?” Jesus answered her, “Neither in this mountain nor in that do we worship God.” We now see God (who is invisible) spiritually; yet believing, we rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory. Jesus’ going away leaves a clear field for faith; it throws us necessarily upon a spiritual life, the center of our faith, hope, and love. It is poor believing which needs to put its finger into the nail-prints; but blessed is he who has not seen and yet has believed. In an unseen Savior we fix our trust, and derive our joy. So must you, my friend.

Dorian Muthig

August 15 at 3:55pm

I obey only myself, as for the fact that I doubt into anything unforseen or unknown. I trust only into things I know about from a self verified source. And I live thoroughly antiauthoritarian. If in any event I should comply with any law or authority, it is the pure kindness of myself, or intelligent thought to circumvent hassle, that will make me do so.
As said, I will live and think as if a god does not exist, aslong as the entity called god wishes by itself to prove its existance. It aparently doesn’t, whereas the most feasible truth is, in fact that it does not exist in that present time I tend to live in. As I have no verified knowledge about the past and future, I cannot tell. However I have verified knowledge, that if it should exist, and has influence it has influence on past, present and future, and that my actions whatsoever are part of that influence or that influence does not exist at all in whatsoever kind.
Concluding from that I derive the knowledge that it is absolutely pointless to obey anything that does not want me to obey by itself.
Jesus was just a pathetic drug addicted plant collector… really… the bible consists of stories that have passed through several centuries by oral transmission. The stories have been altered through that. Also, Jesus himself was not able toread and write. The new testament was written by some jerk which’s name is unknown around 150 a.d. Furthermore, the vatican and the orthodox churches reject a part of the original writing whatsoever because it’s bad for the ‘church business’.
Anyways, if God really exists, he must be an asshole (Jesus, too).
I guess you know why.

OMAR

August 16 at 8:47am

Dorian, please tell me why you consider Jesus to be “an asshole”? To me Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 16 at 5:26pm

Simple. God is an asshole casue if it is and exists it’s letting all the bad things happen. Jesus for him is one because he promoted that thing called god as the ‘best thing ever’ and it being of all good, which it apparently isn’t.

OMAR

August 17 at 1:17pm

What is it about God that you hate so much? In what way has He offended you or anybody else? You will have to explain what according to you is good and bad.
Hope you will write back on the matter about which you seem to be wrong.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 21 at 12:51am

It’s not god itself offending me, it’s what people made out of their ‘invention’.
If there is a god, and it stands still watching people die in horrible ways, what kind of good thing would that be?
And if a god exists, and it has full control and influence on everything aswell as is always around us, then it must be that it wants everything to be the way it just happens, happened and will happen. Bad things including good things. But the good things aren’t for everyone. Neither are the bad things. It’s not balanced and if it’s not balanced, something goes terribly wrong. In whatever matter that might be. If it distorts too much it will eventually break. Break the illusion of what’s not there, or is there, only in doubt or belief to haunt us over and over again until we refuse to let it be or die. Whichever comes first.

OMAR

August 21 at 9:29am

Hi Dorian,
Thanks for your reply in which you expressed your anger against God and His ‘inventors’. Your logic is very sound and convincing. The best thing about you is that you are honest, fearless, frank and indeed a young firebrand. I appreciate everything about you. You are like that because you are very, very young. When you mellow a little with passing of years and experience, you will realize the beauty of Jesus, who is the visible representation of the invisible God. After you have matured in years and experience you will find yourself speaking a different language. You will yourself (by the grace of the Holy Spirit) become a changed person beyond your own imagination and expectation. I will wait until then to hear from you again.
In the meanwhile, please do not hesitate to give vent to your feelings. It is healthy to speak out, even if such shouting disturbs others. It is better to be an outspoken unbeliever than a silent believer who is not moved by his unbelieving friends.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 22 at 5:22pm

My mental self is not as young as you might think it is.
I simply can’t rely on things that aren’t proovable.

OMAR

August 22 at 5:36pm

That’s not right, my boy. You are confident, rather over-confident that you know everything at your tender age.That cannot be. Facts of life and experience go hand in hand. Your attitude to believe only on things provable is unhealthy and will leave you an unhappy man.
It will be a shame if you refused to believe that you are your father’s son unless and until it is proved by DNA tests.
I hope I am not being harsh. I am concerned about you and your welfare.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 22 at 6:13pm

I don’t know everything. I am fully aware of that. It is not possible to know everything. However impossible is nothing. Thus it’s the current condition and the current circumstances causing that fact to be.
Secondly, I never said I am happy about it.
I also do not trust anyone claiming to be my father, because I do not know my father. I also doubt my mother to be my mother, as well as I even doubt the world I live in to be ‘not the real thing’ but an illusion we tend to call the current reality. It sounds crazy I know, but who really knows what’s out there. Who knows that noone manipulates our minds and the past we think we yet lived through is just an idea of someone and it has never been?
You know, the mind is complicated the way it is. And even more complicated it is to understand it, manage it and manipulate it.
I do not believe, I assume it is not and define it as the more feasible truth until convinced of it being otherwise, which in whatever event is not likely to happen. And additionally I doubt everything I cannot be certain of. I outweigh, think and then logically decide for feasibility.
What I achieve is what I declare to be my truth, even if it results in a ‘fact not determined and unknown’ thing.

OMAR

August 23 at 3:02pm

I hope that you will soon realize why you are not happy. You are not happy because you do not believe, you only doubt. Doubt does not lead to truth and if for some Godforsaken reason you do find it you will again doubt the very truth you yourself discovered. So, my friend, I will stop the discussion here with the hope that you will read this and find some solace:
link:\the-good-way.com/eng/intro/i02.htm
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 24 at 12:18am

No, I’m happy about being able to fully control and decide about my consciousness.
I don’t need a god which doesn’t even care about what I’m doing. If there is a god and it doesn’t want me to do what I’m doing it shat stop me doing it. As it apparently doesn’t I can care less.
In a percentage of likeliness that no god or superior being exists which values at 92% I do define it doesn’t and live that way.

OMAR

August 24 at 6:44am

You don’t need a god, fine. Do you want Satan? If not also a satan, then perhaps a friend? If not even a friend, why are you in Facebook? Examine your heart, my friend.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 24 at 8:57pm

No, Satan doesn’t exist either. The Satan you refer to was also invented by human kind to explain all the bad occurences, to have someone to blame for. Nothing more.
Hey, you know, a friend is not a superior being that does not want me to see it, know it exists and whatnot. A true friend is there for you when you need him/her. That’s a lame comparison. The god you call your friend is never there for you, it doesn’t cheer you up and it does not even care if you feel bad. There is nothing wrong with my heart either…

OMAR

August 25 at 5:07am

That’s where you are absolutely wrong, my friend. My God is always with me. He never leaves me or forsakes me. He will do the same with you if you accept Him as your personal Friend. Unlike our unfaithful earthly friends, our faithful heavenly Friend, Jesus cheers us up and He weeps when we weep.
You have admitted that nothing is wrong with your heart. That cannot be. Every human heart is corrupt. That is why we need to convert it into a pure one and for that we need Jesus who can do it for us. If you accept Jesus as your intimate and best Friend and let Him into your heart you will enjoy love, joy and peace which Jesus and Jesus alone can give you, not I or anyone else can.
Read this booklet which I found in the link below and you will have the truth you are seeking:
link:\call-of-hope.org/ems/eng/sss4355eng.html#WHAT+DO+YOU+KNOW+OF+CHRIST%3F

Dorian Muthig

August 25 at 4:56pm

No I’m not wrong. If you think I am wrong it’s because of your personal belief I don’t care about and maybe don’t share with you. You should accept that and stop trying to convert me.
There is no god there for anywone if you want to talk to it, it never answers. If you want some company it’s never there. If you give it a present it won’t take it. If you’re injured/hurt/sad it doesn’t come over to cheer you up with some kind words. If you’re dead it won’t show up on your funeral, clothed black to express sadness.
And if my heart is corrupt like that of anyone else, then that’s the right thing and how it should be. Perfectly fine, nothing to worry about.
And I don’t want Jesus as my intimate friend… I’m not gay, and even if I was, he’d not the kind of living person… ah well you know…
Be with your imaginary friend, but know, only children that are very lonely or outsiders do have their imaginary friends. Usually their disappear some day, when they don’t need that imaginary invisible friend anymore, because they trust into something more sophisticated and real. Think about that.

OMAR

August 29 at 5:16pm

How I look at it
Most of the people who doubt the existence of God are people like you: normal and rational. For doubters and believers alike, I have a story to tell you, a story about a man who went to a barbershop and discuss on the subject of God with a barber.
Barber: I don’t believe that God exists. Go out into the street and you will realize that God doesn’t exist. If God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can’t imagine a loving God allowing all of these things.
Just after the customer left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, unwashed hair and an untrimmed beard and looked dirty and unkempt. The customer returned to the barbershop.
Customer: You know what? Barbers do not exist.
Barber: How can you say that? I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you.
Customer: No, barbers don’t exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like the man outside.
Barber: Ah, but barbers DO exist! That’s what happens when people do not come to me.
Customer: Exactly! That’s the point! God, too, DOES exist! That’s what happens when people do not go to Him and don’t look to Him for help. That’s why there’s so much pain and suffering. If we surrender ourselves to GOD and kill our ego completely, we will find God within us.
Who is the Christ?
link:\the-good-way.com/eng/intro/i10.htm
OMAR

OMAR

August 31 at 9:41am

What is the biggest problem for an atheist like you?
No one to talk to during orgasm.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

August 31 at 11:05am

What?
I’m sorry, but this doesn’t make any sense… You can’t compare a god with a barber… the barber answers, a non-existent god doesn’t, you see
According to some things in the bible, god is everywhere, right? That means I don’t have to go to any other place to talk to it. Apparently, it never answers, does not grant any wishes, nor names any prices for any of such wishes, we might have.
The barber on the other hand, can be seen, he answers when you talk to him and he gives you a shave if you ask for it and pay him.
That’s the whole difference.
And you must be pathetic if you need to talk during an orgasm… really, I mean what do you focus on if not the orgasm itself?

OMAR

September 1 at 2:43pm

You do not seem to know the difference between a joke and serious talk, between reality and the world of fantasy and between…..well, the less said about your understanding of facts of life the better. Grow up, my boy. In the meanwhile read this booklet, which will help you know the difference between the world of your imagination and greed and that of the one made by God:
What will it Profit a Man, if he Gains the Whole World, but Loses his Soul?
link:\the-good-way.com/eng/intro/i13.htm
OMAR

OMAR

September 1 at 5:52pm

THE WISE SAGE…(Wisdom man)
There once was a wise sage who wandered the countryside. One day, as he passed near a village, he was approached by a woman who told him of a sick child nearby. She begged him to help this child.
So the sage came to the village, and a crowd gathered around him, for such a man was a rare sight. One woman brought the sick child to him, and he said a prayer over her.
“Do you really think your prayer will help her, when medicine has failed?” yelled a man from the crowd.
“You know nothing of such things! You are a stupid fool!” said the sage to the man.
The man became very angry with these words and his face grew hot and red. He was about to say something, or perhaps strike out, when the sage walked over to him and said: “If one word has such power as to make you so angry and hot, may not another have the power to heal?”
And thus, the sage healed two people that day.
Have a nice week !
Sabby, a Facebook pal of mine sent me the above item. OMAR

OMAR

September 1 at 5:54pm

Thanks again, Sabby, for the wisdom-filled story.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

September 2 at 7:47pm

Dude, stop trying to convert me, you will not succeed, nor gain anything from doing so. God doesn’t pay you (I don’t know if the church does, though) and you won’t get to heaven, neither hell anyway. When you die, it’s like sleeping without a dream, you just never wake up, you wouldn’t know.
I heard enough of the whole ‘god exists with all his kindness crap tales’.
I think you should consider watching a real sophisticated movie, when you’ve got some time off. But if you still want me to believe a god exists, then go to it, take a photo and show it to me, oh and mark the god in it, transparent gods don’t count.
http://zeitgeistmovie.com/

OMAR

September 11 at 9:11am

I regret to inform you that I cannot accede to your request but I am sure the following book in the link below will give you an idea of who God is:
Did God Appear in the Flesh ?
link:\the-good-way.com/eng/article/a07.htm
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

September 14 at 6:51pm

your imaginary friend?

OMAR

September 15 at 9:15am

You have not met me nor seen me. So am I not your friend? Do I not exist? We know each other by faith so is the case with God.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

September 18 at 4:52pm

Well, actually, I don’t know if you are my friend or just a stranger. I somehow even think you are not ‘real’ by looking at your name and judging from the way you talk about god. Maybe the church pays you to convice people to believe, I don’t know. Or maybe someday you come over hunting me down like peple did with vampires some centuries ago, who knows, but you? I am just guessing here and mentioning the worst case scenario. Also, I would not say I know you, knowing someone takes a lot mor than a conversation about theism or atheism.
My idea is, that god is your imaginary friend.
And my second one is, that religion is a war about who’s got the better imaginary friend.

OMAR

September 20 at 7:39am

When you can doubt me and my real being, I can understand why it is difficult – nay, impossible – for you to doubt the existence of God whom you cannot see.
See my profile and the photographs along with the letters of Mahatma Gandhi and the Prime Minister of India and you will know for sure that you are a slave to the Devil. I cannot save you nor can any other friend of yours except, of course, CHRIST JESUS.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

September 20 at 7:25pm

LOL!
Yeah, but … is already dead, and I really highly doubt you are related to him, because I do not see any reason for you to add me on Facebook in that case. Get the bigger picture?
However, I do not doubt you are a real being, there is not any such advanced artificial intelligence as of yet, being able to at least partly understand a complex conversation.

OMAR

September 21 at 9:56am

That … is dead is a stale and irrelevent news not worth anybody’s attention. However, I will accept it because it comes from the mouth of my friend named Dorian Muthig. By the way, who told you that I am related to that great man of God? How I wish I was!
As you doubt the existence of God so do you doubt everything, even my relationship with real people. Love covers all faults. My love for you will not take into account the grave faults of yours and overlook your ignorance.
OMAR

Dorian Muthig

September 21 at 11:08am

As far as I know, there aren’t any children mentioned in the history books, … could have had, but I don’t know if he really had some or not. And it is quite likely that ones last name is the same as the one your parents had at the time when you were born. Thus, if … is your last name, or that is what you typed in upon Facebook signup, you either are related to him, had your name changed for an irrelevant sum of money, or made your name up, because you’d like to have that particular name for some reason, which might be related to your regiousity.
And I don’t doubt everything, only almost everything. And I always opt for the things that are more likely than others, by doing comparisons and calculations at the utmost exact amount and value I am able to, almost like computers do. For me believing in scientific facts is far more feasible than relying on the bible for example.
And I am very tolerant, as far as there may be probability for something else. Being ignorat would mean I would not even include such variables into my calculations, by simply assuming it is one way, setting that as a fact, for then calculating based on some wrong values for my variables. However, the way I calculate things, I sometimes have to wager according to probability and choose the more likely values to get to my result, that result which may change at a minimum later on due to the discovery of the right and exact value of said variable I didn’t have previously.

OMAR

September 21 at 1:49pm

Wow, Dorian, you are awsome: unbelievably bright and intelligent. I think your country needs people like you. It is people like you that make the country great and lack of people like you make it small. It is hoped that you will do the needful for your beloved country – nay, for the whole world – and not live a life purely for your selfish ends.
Now back to my name. At the time I left Islam and embraced Christianity, my college-days hero Dr. …, Junior was assassinated. At the time of baptism I changed my name … to …. That’s the long and short of the story. Now stop cracking your head over my name which should not be of any importance to anybody.
OMAR

What do you think happens when you experience fear?
What happens, that’s fairly simple. You’re trembling. Because you’re cooling down and sweat, no matter how cold that it is. You still sweat and freeze. It’s really hard to live in fear. You always want to be dead, but you don’t want to die. Just go on living no matter what. In pain, forever trembling, deep inside.
And last: Are you really scared?
I don’t know if I’m really scared, maybe I’m just talking myself into it. And it’s all in the mind, wherever you go, to keep haunting you. But to cease the things you fear is yet, so terribly hard.
No, actually, I’m not, but I like it to appear as if that’d be the case.

Whenever I have an aquaintance I’m using Google to figure out what’s available. A name’s worth so much. I’m searching all social networking sites. I’m even using other spys to let them search. To figure out anything I can get. All the information I could possibly use, in order to know you any better, in order to do you a favor or even invade you, in order to be a step ahead, in order to surge forward, stepping up a level higher, even higher than ever before, to always beat you. Because I just don’t want to loose.

Maybe that sounds crazy, but you know, in fact I’m lazy. All I want you is to fear me. Just to do, what I want you to. Just to control you. All of you out there, be my puppets in this game, this little game, I just so desperately don’t want to loose. Be my puppets and dance. Be my puppets and let your puppetier watch you. Silently watch you, in oder to control you. Just to control you with those tiny and thin puppet’s strings.

OK, honestly, not really, I’m not so serious.

I’m just kidding you know? I was bored and wrote that, but never forget. Wherever you type your name on the web: Someone will always find you.

But actually I don’t mind to be found.

I don’t know how to express myself to others, because they don’t understand a thing. It’s hard to live like that. People always try to understand, well, that’s obviously normal, but in fact they only do, by comparing people, and matching similarities of those people. But it’s important to know, just because some people doing one thing, do the other, too, it does in no way mean, other people doing the same thing, do those other things aswell. People are different. They are all different from each other, even if they’re all the same, the small differences that there are make us unique.

I personally don’t like to fit in this scheme of people, people which simply live through out the day. I want to change things, find new ways for things out there.

And now, there is this geeky part of me, which doesn’t like the real life, and prefers the life on the web. I don’t like to walk around in the city, where all people are watching me. I somehow tend to attract attention, without doing anything. I’m just walking to my local library, and people look at me. I never saw people looking at others, so what is it? Is it good, or is it bad? As I have psychic abilities, I could probably tell, but yet, I can’t. Just because I can’t grab information at will.
So, in order to avoid those people looking at me, which makes me really paranoid, I’ll stay at home, sitting in front of my computer, coding some applications, weeding through forums, and maybe, if I’m bored using some social networks to waste time.

I am a kind person, and I like to help people with their problems. But what I don’t like is to be spammed by people having problems, requesting for help. It’s gotten too far by now, and I chose to block all those people now. As for me, I am most known on the ICQ network, the first social network, ever, and I am receiving too many messages these days. I have choosen to tick this option in ICQ now. It’s called “Accept messages only from contacts”. It’s an option which blocks all incoming messages, that are from people I don’t know, and thus aren’t on my contact list. It’s just sad, that there’s a problem with this, and it doesn’t properly work. But a least, it decreased those neverending messages to a minimal amount. I like this silence.

OK, whatever I wrote there… I don’t even get it anymore…

Are you outstanding and special, too?

You stay up late, and do stuffs you need to do, or maybe things you want to do, and then maybe 2 AM or 3 AM you’re going to sleep. And then when you get up, finally, you take a look at the clock near you and you figure, you slept all day long. Damn it, again so much time was lost. And while you once again try to overcome this limit of time, you always stay up even longer, and longer. And you’re missing a day, and another day, and another…
While doing all this, you get confused, really confused. You’re asking yourself, what time is it now?, what day is it?, and you don’t really seem to know the answer, so you take a look at your calendar, and still, it doesn’t provide you with the information. Luckily there are digital clocks showing the date. All fine, you know the date again, you know what time it is, and you know where you are. But… that doesn’t solve your problem. You’re still asking, what’s going on? It always feels like you’re missing out something important. And then you’re guessing what it might be, but you wont find that part out, because it’s not there where you might be looking.

And this is the time, when you get tired, really tired, and then again you sleep a couple of days, bau yet again, this doesn’t solve the problem either. Just makes it worse, even.

And also, sometimes you can’t sleep all day long, sometimes you can’t get your work done, and sometimes, you can’t solve any of your problems. Sometimes you’re thinking, and on the other hand, there is nothing you seem to be able to figure out.

And you’re tired, really tired, walking through the day, and not even couple cups of coffee seem to help to get you awake. And it’s this thing, this kind of being tired, which kind of blows up your mind, makes you terribly confused, and uable to understand the simplest things. And even then, you can’t seem to get some sleep, sleep you so desperately need, because you don’t seem to have some time off, nor are even able to sleep at all, if you happen to have the time. It’s so horrible, you’re confused, and refuse to let things happen, even if you know they are going to happen anyway. And you don’t notice those things, because you’re so horribly tired. Sleepwalking all day long, neither really sleeping, nor being awake. And it’s driving you nuts, really nuts.

But yet again, you simply resign, and let it be. It happened, and you don’t seem to be able to do something against it.